Monday, October 22, 2007

If Elected : Vote Shlomo!

If elected, I would endeavor to implement the following changes to our society within the first three months of my administration:

1)Legalize marijuana, prostitution, and assisted suicide (If we are serious about the concept of individual freedom, then let's get serious about it!)

2) Universal Health Care (We can't shout "united we stand" with any sense of pride if we aren't willing to care for one another.)

3) Universal Education K-PhD (We always talk-talk-talk about the importance of education for the welfare of our economy and nation, but we treat students like second class citizens and force them to spend more time working than studying.)

4) Ecologically Based National Mass Transit System

5) Increase in Hemp production for paper and bio-fuel (No more special deals for the lumber and paper industry.)

6) The President will be permitted one intern-administered blow-job for each fiscal year providing the the budget is balanced for said year. Should there be a revenue surplus for any year, the President will then be permitted to have the intern stroke his balls as well. (Should the President be a female, then it means that I wasn't elected.)

7) There will be no bombs dropped on anyone who doesn't drop one on us first. No preemptive wars or policing of peoples whose nation's name most of us cannot even spell. If we don't like a nation's policies, we can just as easily ruin their lives by dropping Britney Spears albums on them.

Shlomo in '08!


Anonymous said...

That is a very nice plan, but would you please elaborate as to HOW you will make it work? In a few months?

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